How To Stop Telemarketers From Calling You

Do you get Telemarketers calling you most nights trying to sell you a produce or saying that you have one a free holiday if you signup to their product? Are you sick of these people because they always interrupt you while watching TV or cooking dinner? If you answered yes to any of the above questions, read on to find out how get them to stop calling you.

I was reading a blog post from List and Notes and their solution was for you to tell the telemarketer that they have to speak to “Fred” (or some other fictional name), but say Fred is away for a few weeks, and they can only speak to Fred about this matter.

Although this solution may work, they are still going to call you back when they think Fred is back. So here’s another alternative so they will not call you back.

If this method didn’t work, I won’t be telling you it, but it does. I used to get at least 3 calls a week, now I don’t get any and I have tried this on 2 phone numbers that did get a lot of telemarketing calls.

So what is the trick?

The trick is pretty simple. All you have to do is follow a simple rule: “Don’t hang-up on them, make them hang-up on you”

How you get them to hang-up is up to you, but don’t be disrespectful and blow a whistle into the phone – they are human beings just doing their job.

Below are a couple of ways to get telemarketers to hang-up on you. For this to work and to get the best results, you need to be bored or have a lot of free time. So here we go:

  1. Say you can’t hear them so they have to repeat themselves
  2. Keep saying hello when you answer and say you can’t hear them, anyone there?
  3. Act as you are dumb and have no idea what they are talking about
  4. Have a huge delay when you respond to them
  5. Transfer your call to different people in your house and get the telemarketer to repeat what they are saying to everyone – like what your phone company does when you have a problem. Keep going around in circles until the caller gives up
  6. Make them feel that they have a sale and that you are interested in what they are offering and drag the conversation on for a while, then just turn around and say I already have that and make them hang-up because they wasted so much time
  7. When they sell you a phone deal (or some other sort of deal), say that your with one of their competitors on a really great (but realist deal) that they cannot beat. Always ask “Can you beat XX plan?”
  8. If they say you have won a holiday, say your already on holiday and your phone’s diverted, or even say that you own your own holiday resort better then what they are offering
  9. If they say you have won something and they are about to say “but… you have to do this first”,  interrupt them, scream and cheer to your family that you have won a holiday and how it will change your life because you are really poor – make them feel bad
  10. Say you’ll get someone who can help you, do something for a minute and come back to them saying that person isn’t there. Depending on their response, try and find someone else
  11. Say you’ll get someone else who to take their call because you think like they will enjoy what the telemarketer is offering, and pretend to have a really loud (maybe abusive) argument about something and make sure the telemarketer can hear you
  12. Play a pre-reordered message to them selling a product of your own
  13. Do some self-promotion of your own website, products, blogs etc
  14. Ask them a lot of questions about what they are offering, hard ones if you know the topic in detail and try to make them think
  15. Ask them stupid questions that are plain ridiculous
  16. Ask them how their day was, have they made any sales, how you can become a telemarketer just like them because their job is so cool
  17. Every couple of seconds, press a button on your telephone to make a beeping sound
  18. Ask for their contact details
  19. Get them to take up the offer and say you will only take it up if they take it up first. If they are selling you a cruise and they say they will take it, tell them to get off the phone and pack their bags right away
  20. Speak a different language of gibberish
  21. Keep sneezing (faking it of course) and get them to repeat themselves
  22. Change your voice pitch all the time from high to low
  23. Ask them “Do you know who I am” and pretend that you are a really famous person
  24. Tell the telemarketer you are interested and that you are going to get a pen and then just leave the phone off the hook for a while – By Joachim
  25. Tell them they are in violation of Department of Defense regulation 16A or some random number and that this constitutes a federal offense and that they will be contacted shortly by the FBI for having a secure number – Ken
  26. Answer the phone pretending you are from some telephone chat line where the caller gets charged $2 per minute -  Deanna
  27. Act as you are a hostage negotiator and aim to get the telemarketer to release the hostages – Deanna

Update: Since I got mentioned on LifeHacker, here are a few of LifeHackers readers suggestions

  1. If they ask you a question and they expect your answer to be yes, say no or the opposite. If for example they ask “Do you want to go on a free holiday”, say “I hate holidays, I just want to be worked to death” or “I wish we could eat Panda bears to extinction – they look tasty”. It makes them confused and adds to your enjoyment – By Teaman
  2. A trick I learned from a mate was to let them rant on so you seem interested. Then at the end you say in your creepiest seduction voice “before we proceed further with the deal, I have one question…. what are you wearing?” – By Xavier
  3. Try the Seinfeld approach – When you first answer tell them you are busy but interested and how long will they be at work for. Then say you wont be available to talk to untill they finish work. Ask them for their home number and say you will give them a call (when they will be having dinner). Of course they don’t like to do that which means you can say in your sincerest voice ‘oh i understand, you dont want people calling you at home’ to which they always say ‘yes’ and you can say ‘well now you know how i feel’ and hang up – By Mark
  4. Ask for their ABN, or other business contact information. They freak out and hang up on you – By Jake D
  5. My favourite technique is to pretend they’ve called to buy something off me. I go into a sales pitch and start blabbing on about how I can help them and ask them to clarify exactly what it is their company is looking for. It totally bamboozles the poor telemarketer. The start arguing, trying to explain they are the ones selling and it’s all I can do to keep from dying in fits of laughter – By Travis Y
  6. Ask where they got your contact information from and make it sound like they broke a federal law and will be personally liable for contacting you – By B8two

The whole aim with the above is to get the telemarketer frustrated so they hang-up on you. If you do this a couple of times to them, in a couple of months they will get frustrated from calling you and will give up. If they suspect another time they may make a sale off you, they’ll keep calling you back.

Have you tried this before? Has it worked for you? Do you have any other methods that have worked? Share your stories.

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